DEAR ABBY: Woman abandoned by fiance after her suicide attempt

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Dear Abby: My 38-year-old daughter committed suicide a week ago. She has been living with her fiancé, and they share an apartment with two cats. My wife and I took her home from the hospital and she was with us.

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Her fiancé and her family’s reaction was horrible. Instead of comforting her, they were angry at the pressure she had caused. He stopped calling her and his family stopped her on email and social media. He won’t go to their apartment.

My daughter was under pressure for a long time and kept covering her fiancé with her problems trying to be the perfect character in front of him. This caused her inner turmoil. She now feels it is right for her to hide everything because once they find out she has a problem, they will give up on her.

I suggest that the best thing she can do in the long run is to end her engagement and never see the fiancé or his family again. They show themselves to be terrible people. She shouldn’t marry a man who gave up on her when she needed him the most. I told her it was because they weren’t actually married and now she has the opportunity to move forward into a better life. What should I do to help her? – Her father

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Dear Dad: Your daughter’s fiancé and his family may help her by demonstrating the crisis that disappeared in the crisis. What your daughter needs now is intensive consultation to help her deal with the issues that drive her to commit suicide. Help her by being patient and doing everything possible to make sure she gets it. Maintaining the number of lifelines of suicide and crisis (988) will be cautious. If you need more support, please contact Nami at nami.org.

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Dear Abby: My husband and I have been married for 44 years. That year, he was a drinker and smoker. It is no surprise that our ups and downs are. After four kids and five grandchildren, I finally realized that he was interested in only two things: beer and smoking.

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A year ago, they found spots in his lungs. The doctor said these attractions were small but needed to be checked every year. Isn’t that a wake-up call? I begged him to stop, but he told me to shut up.

I want to tell him that I am leaving home and being with my daughter. I love him, but I can’t see him anymore. I want to live and enjoy my life. He does not leave his home except to work and buy beer and cigarettes. I’ve had enough. I have to enjoy the rest of my life. What do you think, Abby? – Enough in New Jersey

Dear enough: the truth? I’m surprised your marriage has been going on for a long time. Your husband is addicted to alcohol and nicotine and is self-destructive. Joining one of the 12-step support groups for addicts’ families and friends before packing your luggage may benefit you as it may relieve you of your feelings. That said, because your husband refuses to even try to change, I agree that it’s time to start taking care of myself. It’s shocking to watch people hurt themselves.

– Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, founded by her mother Pauline Phillips. Please contact Dear Abby at Dearabby.com or CA 90069 Po Box 69440 in Los Angeles.

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